Collin is 4!!

My sweet, sweet Collin,

Happy birthday love!!  My first born baby is 4 years old!!  How did this happen?

I can remember your birth day perfectly... 

I remember how nervous I was!  In fact the nurse calmly asked "sweetie are you a little nervous?"

"ya a little" was my reply.

She then responded with, "well try to relax dear, your heart rate is faster than your baby's right now."  :)

(And there was your introduction to the nervous nut that you call mommy.)

I remember crying as they prepped me for surgery.  I was excited and scared all at once.  My nurse knew just what to do, she said "is your momma here?  I'm going to go get your momma."  And she did!
(yes that's right son, you will never to be too old to need your momma!) 
Grammy came back, dressed in baby blue, and her and your daddy walked me to the OR.  

I remember how chilly the operating room was when we walked in. Daddy had to wait outside while they prepped me for surgery.  

Your birth was quickly approaching and I could hardly wait.  

I remember daddy coming in and sitting next to me.

I remember laughing with daddy and thinking about how silly it was that I was laying half naked on a table in the midst of a room full of strangers.  ;)

I remember Dr. Lutsic asking me if I was ready, and then she told me she was going to begin.

I remember the pressure as they pushed and pulled you out.

I remember daddy's voice shaking while he said 

"I can see him, he's huge!"  :)

I remember panicking wondering why you weren't crying.

And then it happened...

You cried the biggest, loudest, most beautiful cry.  

I cried, your daddy cried, we all cried.  

I remember the whole room commenting about how big you were.

I remember the nurse calling out 8 lbs 15 oz!  

(Let me go on record stating that your momma predicted your birth weight to the ounce the night before!)

I remember them bringing you to me.  The nurse leaned over your daddy and touched your face to mine.  I kissed your brand new skin and it was in that moment that my heart left my body.  Never will it return to me because I gave it away to you that day.

I remember hearing the sweet lullaby playing throughout the hospital as a signal to all that there was precious new life in this world.

I remember knowing that my life would never again be the same, it would be forever changed by this beautiful boy that we named Collin Ryan.

Collin before you ever even came to be 

you were desperately prayed for,

deeply wanted,

and profoundly loved.

Of all the little boys in this world God gave me the exact one that I wanted.
You are an answer to prayer...
You are a treasured gift...
You are a blessing...
You are ours!

Someday you will have children of your own and it is then that you will finally come to realize just how much your daddy and I love you...

Be blessed sweet boy!

Happy Birthday!!