I take the kids to visit grandma and grandpa most Sunday afternoons. He was always in his chair, and I would watch him just admire Collin and Madelyn. There were even times that he would tear up as he would tell me of his love for them. He loved us all fiercely. Time will not erase the memories we made, the laughter we shared or the love that we have in our hearts for you Grandpa...
I wasn't sure when or how I would tell Collin. God seemed to open that door tonight. Grammy and Papa kept the kids all day while we were at the funeral home. I went and picked them up and as we were driving home Collin kept pressing about where I had been all day. I finally said
"We were at a funeral"
"What's that?" he wondered.
"It was for Grandpa, he went to heaven to live with Jesus. He won't be living at Grandma's house anymore and we won't see him for awhile BUT someday when we get to heaven Grandpa will be there waiting for us!"
I was expecting a "why" because Collin always asks why...
Instead he let out a sob...
a very sad sob...
which was followed by
"Ohhhhhh, I won't see Grandpa anymore!!"
And in that moment I was so surprised at his understanding that Grandpa was gone.
"Oh we'll see him again, sweet boy, someday when we get to heaven we will see him again."
He cried a little longer and asked
"Well why can't he live with Grandma? I want to see Grandpa!"
My heart broke and my tears fell.
"Jesus was ready for Grandpa, He has some jobs for Grandpa to do in heaven."
"I'm sad mommy, I'm sad I won't see Grandpa."
"I know you're sad buddy, and it's ok to be sad. It's ok to miss Grandpa. I know you're sad that you won't see him for awhile but we will see him when we get to heaven...."
And that was the statement that quieted his tears. Telling him it's ok to be sad seemed to calm him. He went on to ask how he got here. We've talked about this before but I love telling the story...
"God made you just for us! Mommy and daddy asked Jesus for a special baby and God gave us YOU!! God put you in mommy's belly and we loved you right away! You are so special and God made you for our family. We asked Jesus to give you a brother or a sister and God gave us Madelyn! We love you to the moon and back...."
We pulled into our driveway and all was well in his world. I know he will miss Grandpa. It's hard to imagine that the next time we go to Grandma's that Grandpa won't be in his chair. It will be a sad reminder of our new reality.
Family was Grandpas greatest treasure and we will all take very special care of his beautiful bride, Grandma Franzel.
We love you Grandma...
our hearts are heavy for you...
our prayers for you are endless...
we will take care of you!
Thank you Lord that death does not have to be the end. That you sent your son to die on a cross to save us from our sin that we may have eternal life with you!
All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.